What do Georgia State and David Letterman have in common?

Before I review Georgia State’s dismal 44-0 loss to Appalachian State on Saturday in the winter wonderland that was Boone, I need to provide some context:

In 2003, David Letterman couldn’t fulfill his duties as host of his TV show because he was ill. Turns out, he had the shingles.

Guests hosts filled in for him for at least two weeks until he finally returned.

When he returned to the Ed Sullivan Theater, Letterman of course did one of his customary Top 10 lists.

He introduced the topic, “Top Ten Good Things About Having the Shingles.” Paul Shaffer repeated it, as he usuallyl does. The band played the music, the graphics came onto the screen.

And then Letterman started the list… drum roll…

No. 10 (edited): There’s nothing good about the shingles. The suckers are so painful, every minute you pray someone will shove a red-hot poker up your butt.

That was it. There were no Nos. 9-1.

He closed the Top 10 list and off they went.

So, with that in mind, here’s my very short review of Georgia State’s loss to Appalachian State.

The Mountaineers had 567 yards.

The Panthers had 62.

That’s it.

There’s your review.

I’ve reached out to a couple of stats services to try to see if that is the fewest yards gained by an FBS team this year. I’m also trying to find out if that’s the biggest difference in yards between two FBS teams this year.

If there has been a worst performance, I haven’t read about it.

In the past two weeks, the Panthers have given up more than 100 points and more than 1,200 yards.

If anyone out there thinks it’s going to get better on defense next year, I can only see it happening if coach Trent Miles and his staff absolutely load up on junior college players in the front seven because any freshmen they sign won’t be big enough and strong enough to compete on the FBS level. That’s obvious based upon the past two weeks.

The players that are on the roster and are playing simply aren’t cutting it the past two games, either, so I wouldn’t count too much on potential as some sort of elixir. That can change, but potential doesn’t give up more than 1,000 rushing yards in two games.

The Panthers have given up more rushing yards in two games than around 40 teams have this season heading into this weekend.


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